Goku's Choices
by animecrazd
Summary: Goku make a choice, but can he live with that choice! will read to find out.


Goku's Choices

Rating K+ This is my first ever fanfic I'm not an English major I'm an artist and I love to watch and drawl anime all the time, but I had some Idea's so I wrote them down.

**WARNING**: There is character DEATH, and little Gore.

If you are the type of person that is net picky maybe this isn't for you.

**Disclaimer**- I do no own Saiyuki

Goku:

Goku removes his power limiter and it falls to the ground.

He sees the shock and surprise in the eyes of his travel companions.

The world turns to pain as the chaos take him he sees in his mind people that he recognizes, but can't for the life of him remember seeing them before.

He knows somehow they are important to him and reaches out for them.

Sanzo:

Sanzo can only watch in horror as the boy takes his power limiter off and it falls to the ground.

"That stupid monkey" he says as the change takes hold over the once energetic and loving boy remodeling his features to long, hard, and sharp claws.

His brown hair grows out to 3 times the length.

His teeth sharpen and become more k-9 and his normal wide child like golden orbed eyes are now narrowed and catlike.

The worst of it all is the expression on his face no long has the innocent look of a boy but a creature that desires only the death of all that it encounters.

His body the same small size of the of a child's, but now has the look and movement of a tiger stalking it prey and preparing to strike.

He watches as this creature that once use to be fun loving child that though of fighting as more of game mercilessly rips apart every living being in his path friend or foe and with the smile on his face and that laugh that doesn't sound like a child's laugh, but one of something that was insane.

He seen and feared this look before and hoped beyond anything to never see it again.

He rushes to stop him like he always had done before, and the last thing see sees before he dies is.

Goku the boy he took in the same boy that had taught him to care and love again standing over him licking the blood from the mortal wound off his fingers with a look of deep satisfaction on face.

For his gun had been thrown away for he couldn't bare to kill him. He had given him something he wanted to protect and he knows that he couldn't live with out him.

It was selfish to die and leave him to the sorrow he knows he would feel.

He was young any maybe he would come to here a voice and he to would be saved, after all Goku had done the same for him.

He pull him back from the depth of his sorrow and help him love and care again.

That was the last thought of Sanzo before he slipped in to the darkness.

Goku:

In his mind he reaches out for someone desperate for some reason to find him and to know who he is.

Flashes of memory take a hold of him, and he sees his younger self in chains and in front of a tall blond man with long hair in a pony tail hanging over his shoulder and pale white skin amethyst eyes and a red chakra in the middle of his forehead.

He reaches for the hair "Its shiny like the sun" he says and tugs on the hair.

Flashes of the when the man who seemed so important to him gave him his name, and the way he smiled when he thought no one was looking.

This man was his protector, his savor, and his sun yes that was what he was the embodiment of everything that was bright and interesting in the world.

Then more flashes of other people a tall redhead with short hair and red eyes had stuck up for him where no one else did other then the one like the sun.

He remembers this man ruffling hair and teasing him and his ever-cool attitude like what he would have imagined a big brother doing.

Flashes of another man thin dark haired green eyes behind glasses he was wearing a lab coat and looking a him remembers thinking this man must be important and smart for he had a look of I'm to bissy reading to bother with hygiene.

He remembers this man teaching him things like reading and writing showing him things about life this man was his teacher.

Lastly he got flashes of a boy like him, but he never got to see his face.

He had the knowledge form somewhere he didn't know where like the rest of the people he sees that this was his friend he was like himself was put down and fear by most this boy was the one he got into trouble with and the boy was reaching out to him.

Goku started to reach out to take this boy's hands and the boy was trying to drag him some where but where.

He was being dragged past other memories that he wanted to explore but they were just blinks and fading images of pictures in his mind.

His is big brother, his teacher and the his sun throughout what to him seem like life times they seemed to be changing appearances slightly, but no matter how there outward appearances might have changed he always know they where the ones he love and the only ones in the world who loved him.

Finally he knows his name Sanzo his sun the one that has always been his protector.

The one who saved him from his dark prison to show him a world that was far better than the sun.

Then there was Gojo his big brother who he always argued with and competed for food with.

Then there was Hakkai his teacher the one who he always was able to go to talk about his feeling and the only one who could make him understand without making fun of him.

The hands let go and him and he woke to the smell of blood.

He remembers the fight there was to many he had to do something, so he reached up to take his limiter off.

He now was looking around him for there was no ground but a river of blood and scattered limbs.

He had blood splatter on his clothes and in his mouth and down his chin.

There in the distance he see someone the Merciful Goddess standing, but no Sanzo and where were Hakkai and Gojo Maybe they had left seeing that he could handle things.

There next to someone torn in half literally in a puddle of his blood and innards was his sun his Sanzo the brightness of his world his only savior in life.

Goku seen Hakkai and Gojo too and they were all mangled and ripped to pieces murdered by his hand in the most grossly way he could imagine.

He dropped to his knees next to Sanzo and screamed with tears in his eyes. WWHHHHY? He in his mind already knows the answer to that.

Just then the merciful Goddess walks over next to him.

Goku cried why did I do this, why did I have to kill them?...WWHHHHY?

Merciful goddess:

She looked at him and said" Goku did you ever wonder why you chose that staff which is a weapon to protect yourself and a weapons to subdue, but not to kill."

I think along time ago you knew that you had a great power and that you didn't want to kill with it.

In order for you to kill you know you would have to become a monster.

These are the choices that everyone must make any even you an immortal still have that choice Goku.

You were the one long before your trip to heaven that asked us the Gods to give you that choice I believe that then you know that your choices didn't just affect you but all that is around you.

Goku:

No, I want to die please kill me and let me be in a world ware I don't know the sun.

If I never know the sun then I wouldn't know how wonderful and bright life is only to be left with wondering in the darkness.

Merciful Goddess:

I can't kill you I made that bargain a long time ago.

You know him as Sanzo, but then it was Konzen he gave up haven and was force to the lower world so that you wouldn't have to live with that choice forever.

That it why you were locked away in that prison alone for all those years and will be again that was your punishment for you crimes.

Konzen and the others were force to live out there lives as mortals down her on earth. Every lifetime Konzen comes and frees you, and every time you are the one who takes his life from him.

Now like I said I made a bargain and I will keep it so I will erase your memory and this will start all over again.

Goku:

No, I don't want to ever do this again I don't ever want to shed blood again. He pleads with her to kill him.

Merciful Goddess:

Then next time maybe will choose differently, I guess we will see.

I don't feel sorry for Sanzo and the others, you gave them something to love and protect so much that they would give up heaven and die for you.

That is more than most get in a lifetime, so it will be you that I will pity for.

I will sit and watch you while you wait in darkness tell you are feed again.

Just be happy you won't remember what you have done for that is the gift Konzen I mean Sanzo has given to you a gift he has paid for in blood.

With that she walks over to the horrified Goku and lefts him up.

Once he is on his feet, but barely standing she lefts his face to hers and bends taking his lips and kissing him passionately.

Silent tears roll down his face as she reaches with her tongue sweeping away the memories and the pain.

He suddenly doesn't know where he is or why he was crying and let himself be swept away by the touch of her lips pressed to his.

Throwing him self fully into her embrace of her kiss and letting all he has know and everything he cared for be taken with the pain.

He falls into the depth of his mind and everything is dark and he is alone.

Goku:

He wakes to a chirping bird just out of his reach from the chains that bind him.

He is alone in a dark crave like prison and doesn't know why he was put there.

Somewhere maybe in the depth of his mind he hears a voice that seems to call out to him.

What voice?

Who?

He didn't know anyone just the bird that he can't reach and the cold, sharp, and hard rocks that he lays on.

Somewhere in his mind he knows there should be someone that he can't forget.

Who?

Is it the bird that's calling to him and he reaches out again in vain for the bird.

The End

I was thinking of make this into more, but I don't know so if you could give me input! Tell me if this is readable Ok!


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